all the while

as I watch birds die, my brother is being wined and wowed at Elton John's New York gala 60th birthday party.

I await further news of celebrity shoulder rubbing, but did receive a breathy and excited voice mail on my mobile about having a smoke with the Scissor Sisters and then another message with the running tab of celeb party goers that he shared a room with including, but not exclusive to:

- Emma Thompson
- Barbara Walkers
- Sharon Stone
- Eric McCormick
- Tony Bennet
- Pierce Brosnan
- Kiefer Sutherland
- Diane Sawyer
- Kid Rock
- Liz Hurley
- Donatella Versace

I hope for photos. And no more birds lose thier heads in my back garden.

gross but true

According to The Edinburgh Evening Paper... from February 2007

A SPARROWHAWK clutches a pigeon in the Grassmarket in the latest of a series of attacks in the Capital.

The bird of prey is usually found in woodlands but has recently been seen venturing into the city. At Christmas, a number of pigeons on the Royal Mile were killed by sparrowhawks.

RSPB head of species Duncan Orr Ewing said he thought they were nesting in nearby Holyrood Park.

He said:

"The Royal Mile is perfect for hunting because there is plenty of cover and lots of birds. They won't go hungry there. A large female will easily take a pigeon.

"They'll fly low along the buildings for cover then appear round the corner and surprise their prey, catching them in mid-air.

"They will eat their prey where they kill it."

There is thought to be a population of about 30 pairs of sparrowhawks in Edinburgh.

And one of them came into our world.

update

Murdering bird just flew back to find his supper. And wouldn'tya know it, Mark had JUST took it to the bin in the street. He stood on the grass just looking at the spot where he left the guy, like "Wha? He was just here! Damn. What am I going to tell the Mrs?" Now Mark has me feeling gulty that his babies are going to go hungry. And he must murder again.

dead bird in the back yard I know, I know it's serious

(Sing to the tune, "Girlfriend in a Coma" by Smiths)

Violent afternoon in the backyard.

Bird of prey, possibly Golden Eagle swooped down on to an unsuspecting lone pigeon wandering around our garden at about 3 this afternoon and "Whoosh"... feathers literally flying, Mark yelping (He was in the conservatory studying with a front row view) and suddenly the pigeon is headless. And lifeless, The murdering hawk flew away without its snack and now we have a dead bird in the back yard. We thought the hawk would return to, I dunno, eat it? Play with it? Show his pals? Alas, no.

It is distracting and odd. And am thanking he universe for having someone like Mark who can brandish a garbage bag and make it go away. I don't feel compelled to bury him. We weren't even friends. He was trespassing. Still, I feel for the guy. He never saw it coming.

one of the best

And most unsung delicious sensations is that subtle irritation in your eyes, but not enough to really even be a conscious thought in your head. And then discovering an errant eyelash stuck in your eye.

Suddenly it all makes sense. And once it is gone, it is a miracle. You were uncomfortable without really knowing why. And then suddenly, all feels nice again.

This
Feels
Like
Life

my weekend culinary feats

1) 2nd time roasted mushroom risotto from Jamie Oliver's Italy cookbook
2) thai butternut squash soup
3) banana and pumkpin bread (after the miracle of discovering Libbys canned pumpkin at the health food store around the corner)

hate and love

Things I hate
1. starting to feel my age
2. the awkward time between finishing a good book and starting the next one
3. re-runs you have seen so many times you can glimpse one scene and call the episode
4. not knowing if I am too old to reproduce
5. after I ask “what, pardon me” 3 times and I still can’t understand a Glaswegian accent
6. not knowing where we will be living/what we will be doing in 6 months
7. my round reflection in store windows
8. having a temporary job
9. not knowing where I belong
10. my never ending black-bruised fingernail
11. not taking advantage of free time

Things I love
1. my new MacBook
2. having to figure out my taxes. Again.
3. feeling lifted when spending time with people I really like
4. good pens
5. remembering I like music; the new Patty Griffin CD
6. not knowing where we will be living/what we will be doing in 6 months
7. the first purple crocus heads popping up
8. having a temporary job
9. belonging wherever I go
10. my Amaretto shade of nail varnish
11. King of Queens
12. a whiff of possibility
13. blended soup
14. having more things I love than hate

i feel his pain

me and sam let it out

Do I contradict myself?/ Very well then I contradict myself,/ (I am large, I contain multitudes.)
- Walt Whitman