Wednesday 2 December 2009

what I've learned in 6 weeks of motherhood

  1. Doing one household chore a day is an accomplishment. Load of laundry or making a meal or changing the sheets or paying the bills. The operative word is ONE.
  2. Little fingernails are sharp
  3. On demand feeding is, well, demanding. And leaves little time for anything else
  4. Taking a book out of the library doesn't mean you will read it
  5. Babies make you stupid and unable to really hold a proper conversation
  6. You start to talk in the 3rd person to your spouse in a passive aggressive way ... "Daddy is making a mess in the kitchen." "Daddy is taking his sweet time getting ready"
  7. You will do anything to insure getting sleep, like going to bed at 8 pm every night and following the same pattern because it worked once
  8. Boobs are just food and they come out everywhere
  9. Smiles and giggles from your little one reduce you to a pool of mush
  10. It is vital to all persons to get outside and get air every single day
  11. Hideous windy Scotland rain makes number 10 challenging
  12. You can't imagine how any single parent copes
  13. Breastfeeding may burn off as many as 600 calories a day, but eating miniature Snicker bars in bed while nursing may counterbalance any weight loss
  14. You can't help comparing your baby and your parenting to other people, even if you don't want to
  15. You root and cheer for burbs and farts, but only from your little one
  16. You know you are supposed to cherish every minute but secretly sometimes wish he was 4, potty trained and could chat with you
  17. Fashion goes by the way of easy-access-breast-whipping out tops
  18. Sleeping on your stomach is as lovely as you remember
  19. You find yourself squeezing your boobs in public without a second thought to check which one is fullest
  20. Watching your son and your husband smile at each other gives you utter blissful feelings
  21. You still can't believe this small person is yours and wonder when the grown ups are going to show up
  22. Hours fly by like minutes when you are having quiet time staring at the little one
  23. You do indeed check to make sure he is breathing if things have been too blissfully quiet for too long
  24. You envy the baby's adorable snugly outfits and wish you could pull them off
  25. When you get even a moment, you realise how happy you are


kq said...

carol: face it, dear, you can pull off the snuggly outfits. don't deny yourself.

Madeline (aka Miri) said...

I love this posting. There are so many of these that are true for me too. The passive aggressive 3rd person, the squeezing boobs in public, the fashionable tops are only good if they are good for nursing. I never get to wear dresses anymore!


William Rey Ong said...

Just do what you think as long as you are comfortable.

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